What would you do about a neighbor like this?

Question

I live in the U.K in a very small rural village called Barton Mills in Suffolk. To be diplomatic I have changed the names of the characters described. My next-door neighbor is Kevan who lives there with his wife Rachael. The house next to that is where Rachael’s father Ron (70) who is a widower lives. I have lived here for 17 years and from the moment I moved in Ron has harassed me. He stares through my windows as he walks past my house and stares at my wife if she is in the front garden. I don't mean just having a look I mean staring to the point of twisting his neck like an owl to give it the maximum effect. It is definitely intended to intimidate my wife. My other neighbors call him Stretch for this owl like ability. If anyone comes to my house he will be outside my house peering round the hedge to see what's going on. He picks up litter in the street and pushes into my hedge as he goes by. He reports everything I do to the council and does the same to my other neighbors.
My other neighbor John recently built a conservatory on the back of his house with full planning permission and building regs etc and Ron still complained to the council about it even though he could not even see it. The council officer turned up at Johns house to investigate only to find every bit of paperwork in order.
I think the most important thing when dealing with someone like this is not to become like them so I refrain from comment, keep to myself and ignore him completely which is a far more diplomatic policy than my neighbor Mark who just gives him the finger and stares right back. The harassment is taking its toll though so I wonder if you have any ideas.

Answer 1

Invite him over and read him your epic Voganesque poem. What was it called again... You know the one that caused spontaneous implosions of subhumorous craniums at the last reading. Or, you can have a one way discussion at him outlining the benefits of toe clippings in Jello molds while shaving moles' fluffins. The guy sounds like a prime example of why there's crime against the elderly.

Answer 2

I wrote you a super detailed answer, then tapped the wrong button on my keyboard and lost it all, so here is a synopsis.

Conspire with your wife to engage in parroting back some of his behavior to him, and finding some way to defuse it with humor. I suspect you're both comic geniuses so 'ave a go at 'im guvnors. Like how funny would it be if your Ladywyfe

walked over and went eyeball to eyeball with him next time he stared? Who would blink first? That sounds funny...

What are you REALLY dealing with here? He's an old man, probably starved for attention, and he'll get it any way he can , be it good or bad..The psycho-analysts already have got this one figured. You've got a life and a wife...he's probably got neither..and you know the old adage..misery loves company... Really I believe if the two of you just chat him up a bit more, your troubles would be 80% percent over.

If all this fails, invite him over for dinner, and serve him an

undercooked blood sausage as an entree (on a clean white plate)..don't fry it ..boil it..The ensuing heart attack he has when he cuts into it and it explodes all over him will serve up an end to your troubles. But you didn't hear that from me...Death by blood sasusage really drives the forensics people batty. Good Luck!

Answer 3

There are two ways

1. Move



2.(More practical) Get hidden cameras to survey the sidewalk so you can tape when he is staring at your wife, also put it other places and if you showed it to the police after a week or so he might be visited by them, also keep a journal of his actions, every time he reports something write it down, i'm sure the council officer doesn't like him for making himself go down just to find out nothing is the matter. If this doesn't work refer to Number 1

Answer 4

You Brits have it easy. My neighbors here in New York deal drugs, yours just stares at you? I say let time take it's course. He certainly can't hurt you just by staring at you, and if he files enough phony complaints the local authorites (the Council, or whatever you folks across the pond call them) will put him on an informal "harrasser list" and move him down their priority list until he eventually gets ignored.



If you want legal revenge, you could consider mounting a video camera on the exterior of your house and aim it straight at his property and then send him a letter about it. It doesn't even have to be a real camera that's connected to anything, and it will drive him crazy.

Answer 5

It's one thing to ignore someone's slight or indiscretion, or even annoying quirk.

But this A$$hole is going out of his way to make your life miserable on a daily basis. For this, he must be punished in kind. It's not worth it for you to live in constant misery and humiliation. It will only encourage this jerk continue his rotten behavior.

No, you can not ignore this person and refrain from comment. You have to put the litter back in his yard and/or video tape his stupid behavior. You may need to invest in a tall, solid privacy fence - one that this freek can not see through or over. This will be a good punishment for him because then he'll be agonizing over what's going on behind that cursed barrier.

You might also want to get a dog . I bet that would really pisss this guy off. Do as many legal things as you can to make this guy go over the edge and be forced into a mental home.

Answer 6

Sounds like the old guy has some serious problems. Have you talked with Kevan and Rachel about his activities? He could be mentally ill or possibly have Alzheimer's. I would speak to his family about him. If that doesn't help, or if he is sound in mind.....go to the authorities. He is invading your privacy to say the least. Good Luck.

Answer 7

I'm sorry to hear that your neighbor is harassing you. Can you not file a report of harassment to the local authorities? Have youtalked to Rachael about her father's actions? Perhaps she can talk some sense into the man?? Good luck.

Answer 8

I had a neighbour like that and to make it worse I lived in a cul-de-sac and he lived at the end

.He became friends with my neighbour tried to get my dog shot by the ranger but they had previous dealings with him and they told me he rang at least once a day to complain about something or someone in the street.

In the end my cat disappeared he killed and admitted it but not to the police he put in a complaint to them saying I slandered him by accusing him of cruelty to animals.

I ended up moving not because of him but a couple of years later I had a visit from the police they told me he had been getting threaten calls and they thought it was me it worked out he had killed some-elses cat they were not going to let him get away with it.

See karma always comes back to haunt people like that.

Answer 9

I think I would really connect with him. We'd hang out together, go to the show. Then, we'd sit on the porch and clean our guns, taking pot shots a varmints. Later that evening, we would cozy up to the fire and really explore each others sensitive sides...



Sadly, over the years, we would draw apart. He tilts his head to the right. I tilt mine to the left. We should have recognized that basic difference between us early on...but, such is life.



At his funeral, I will be the only one wearing black...

Answer 10

He's an old git and if it wasn't for the old bit I'd have delivered a san keku geri ages ago.

His face gurns like a sock puppet turning inwards on itself.

Answer 11

Start sending invitations on his behalf to every religious cult and sales loony in the country. Register him for time-share seminars, pots and pans demos, Hare Krishna visits etc. Start doing yard work in the nude.

Answer 12

Return the love, just find little ways to screw with him. Bullies usually have a tough time when they are given a taste of their own medicine. I had a neighbor in Texas who tried to intimidate me, I made his life so miserable he decided to move.

Answer 13

Death from above is probably right but madder than i think.

You fellas are too nice to the guy and try to be polite all the time.

If it were me, i'd cut off his earsand give him to eat!



And oh!, Death from above, did you say Stoogie? and add comic relief?

Ha ha ha ha, such a mission will make stoogie real brutal!!!

U don't want to bring out the devil in him. do u?

Answer 14

I know that all these won't apply to every situation, but there's always plenty of ways to get even (muahahaha!). Try the website below, or simply google "ways to get even".



http://help.lockergnome.com/general/Ways-ftopict17308.html

Answer 15

Wow, you need to either tell someone about it or talk to that guy and figure out why he's doing it



Or maybe he's just getting old

Answer 16

Yes I think there's problem here. I wouldn't be surprised if a few missing people turned up buried in his back yard. That's my honest opinion.

Answer 17

Walk around naked! When you go to get the paper, wear boxers with your johnson hanging out. If your wife is unattractive and overweight, have her walk around naked too (it won't work if she's smoking hot, he'd just leer more)!

Answer 18

i would talk to his family first and tell him what he is doing to the neighbors and if thats doesnt work you should take him to court to get the harassment to stop

Answer 19

Call the little men in the white jacket,s. they will take him away.and little red riding hood lived happily ever after.

Answer 20

ah, grasshopper (loads his Kimber CDP .45 and racks the slide), all you had to do is to tell me, please call me with the address at 1.614.596.6056 and I will be there on the next flight. I will take care of it, in a New York minute, I promise.

You limeys are afraid to take drastic measures... too polite and too civilized, well, I am neither...

I will bring Stooge with me. Just for comic relief...



EDIT: Freeman, are you talking to me, are you talking to me???!!!, I mean, are you talking to me ?????!!!!!

I like the smell of grilled neighbors in the morning...

Answer 21

I think you should make some changes to your house's architecture. so that he couldn't see whatever is going on in your home. and try to avoid him do not be frank to him.



http://www.bayrozgar.com

http://www.apnigari.com

Answer 22

mark's on the right idea

give it back, ignore

or move

Answer 23

Do it the Yankee way.



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l2dtMaBClK0